SARAH KERNOCHAN

If Joni Mitchell and Warren Zevon had a child...that's sort of a description of Sarah Kernochan. Like Joni, lanky blonde Sarah was sexy in spite of herself. Her music intrigues and disturbs with awkwardly lilting melodies and rhythms. The lyrics have a Zevon-esque sardonic sense of humor. Her bizarre subject matter includes trailer trash ("Mobile Home") and sexual fantasies with dangerous pirates while screwing her boring boyfriend ("Can I Get On Top This Time?")

She was probably the first (this is the early 70's) woman to really get aggressive about oral sex: "Who told you it was nasty? They must be really sick." Attention ill folks, listen to that track and get at it: "It's All Right, It Won't Bite."

Kernochan's two RCA albums won some critical raves, but disappeared quickly as usually happens to any record with a literate lyric sheet enclosed. Sarah went on to write a book called "Dry Hustle" (about what you think it's about) and then films including "Marjoe" and "Hairy Bird." "Hairy Bird" (referring to exactly what you wish it wasn't) was re-issued with the less genitally-referenced title, "All I Wanna Do." It's a cult classic, probably hurt at the box office by being an indie, similar to "Girl, Interrupted" in theme, and having Kirstin Dunce instead of Wynona Ryder and Angelina Jolie. Sarah also wrote the screenplay for "What Lies Beneath," and is married to a Broadway hotshot writer/producer named James Lapine.

The title of her first album is "House of Pain." The title track's a lovely, limping, aching and odd ballad based on the horror movie "The Island of Lost Souls." Always one to take a chance or just do something odd, she includes an aural pun about a needle stuck into a patient with a debilitating result. But hear it for yourself:

HOUSE OF PAIN

IT WON'T BITE (the oral sex song)

The Trailer Trash MOBILE HOME

artistic but rude CAN I GET ON TOP sex song

Note: almost all of Sarah's songs are on her website, so if these links don't work it might just be a change in her web server or some other minor glitch. Just go get 'em direct from her site.