Sunday, August 19, 2012


It's August, and see how bright and warm it is! It's even hot in Greenland, Sweden and Norway. Thanks to global warming, radical Muslims are saying, "Brain-frying heat soon way up North?!? Let's immigrate and take over!"

It's probably still flat, cold, gray and unpleasant in Holland, though. Especially where big fat Dutch people tred in their wooden shoes. So let's stop insulting minor-league countries and...pretend we are all in Cal-eee-fornia, and we've got our hans on a nice big bottle of zuntan oil, und ve are vatching vimmin in itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikinis!

Just to make Eurotrash feel at home, the choice of bikini song is not in English. It's "Itsi Bitsi Petit Bikini" courtesy of the late great Dalida. The "zun" shined on her in terms of professional success: over 50 gold records and millions of copies sold in ten different languages. But her private life was marked by depression, some health issues, and the increasing number of people around her committing suicide.

And this entry started out so bright and cheerful. Sorry, but sunlight doesn't last all night. But night can last all day. Just ask the Swedes. No wonder they too are driven to suicide. Or stealing music in a desperate attempt to be happy.

And another apology to any rabid fan who thinks its sacrilege to Photoshop the beloved lady onto a bikini-clad model. It's a tribute. No, it's a pun. No, it's irony.'s...what's that thing that is the same backward and forward? Yes, what it is, is a palindrome. Now back to our morbid story.

One of the great loves of Dalida's life was the suicidal singer Luigi Tenco, who was probably already depressed because his last name was too close to Tesco. In 1967, he and his bride-to-be Dalida did a duet of "Goodbye, Love, Goodbye," ("Ciao Amore Ciao") but when the song failed to win at the San Remo Fesival, he shot himself in the head. Dalida discovered the body, and his suicide note directly implicating the tone-deaf judges of the contest. Dalida tried to get over this horrifying trauma but within 30 days she sentenced herself to death, taking an overdose of pills. For five days she was unconscious before medics were able to bring her back to life.

Life went on…Dalida found a new lover, got pregnant, had an abortion…and the procedure left her unable to have any more children. But she still had plenty more traumas. In 1970, another love of her life, Lucien Morisse, shot himself in the head.

In 1972, she found stability with a new love, Richard Chanfray, and that may have also helped her cope with the 1975 suicide of her beloved friend Mike Brant, who tossed himself off a building in Paris…the same romantic city where Dalida had taken her overdose. Her relationship with Chanfray soured by 1981 and, you guessed it, Chanray killed himself in 1983.

The always amusing Wikipedia notes that after this man's death, "Dalida had relationships with various anonymous men such as a sound technician, a lawyer, an Egyptian jumbo jet pilot, and lastly a French doctor named Fran├žois during the period 1986-1987." That was quite a period this woman had. Along with all her personal turmoil, Dalida continued to work. Despite two risky eye operations, she was able to not only continue her recording career, but star in a movie and take on live concert dates. She was reportedly in the midst of recording sessions for a new album in late April and early May of 1987. Sunday May 3rd was an off-day…and she took it literally, offing herself with sleeping pills. Of the ten languages she spoke, she chose to write her final words in French: "La vie m'est insupportable. Pardonnez-moi."

But…always look at the bright side of life. Dalida left behind hundreds of songs (including a haunting disco number previously posted on this blog) and if you walk outside, you just might enjoy the nourishing light of day, the fresh August breeze, and the sight of some beautiful girl in a bikini! Or, you could get sunburn, breathe air pollution, and realize you have no chance with that girl at all.

The doll DALIDA!

Itsi Bitsi Petite Bikini Download or listen on line. No capcha codes, no wait time, no DepositFiles bullshit of stupid ads for losers who play video games or love Japanese anime. No visits to a crap-cloud that serves you pop-unders from spammy spyware sites that give you the "are you sure you want to navigate away from this page" sticky stuff to keep you trapped till you have to force-quit.

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