Sunday, October 09, 2016

A Vita Shit of Pail

Ever wonder why your favorite rock group hasn't put out an album in 10 years, or more? Why your favorite rock group only has one original member? And why your favorite rock group doesn't tour unless it's a fake "farewell" performance that tricks some booker in Finland into taking a chance?

Chances are, the reason is that the man in charge is a nasty egomaniacal has-been old goat, who can't come up with new songs, can't get along with anyone, and alienates everyone except for maybe a toady running his website for free.

The last time I checked, one particular old favorite group has really run aground. They've had hard times. It's so bad, I don't even want to mention their name. For ten years, they've averaged maybe five gigs a year, with only ONE original member who pays himself while the pretty much work for nothing but the "prestige" of being able to say they're in a (once famous) band.

The lead singer has fallen face-first in a drunken stupor, been accused (I think wrongly) of leading Nigerian sociopaths into killing Christians, and ultimately has had delusions that he's actually Adolf Hitler. This has not helped in getting gigs. He has gone so totally mad that he sings with a German accent; his once famed braying-bugle voice now sounding like a mad Nazi duck on drugs.

But don't take MY word for it. I took a bus to a train to a zeppelin to Norway to secretly record him at the sound check to a show that was canceled. Yes, as soon as the booker (that's spelled BOOKER) heard how badly the hit song was being sung, he shouted "Raus!" Once you hear how this once-great singer now performs, you'll agree: this lead singer is all wet, and his cover band has run afloat.

Un Vita Shit O Pail