All those Nazis out there, those Tea Baggers, those fundamentalist Christians showing up at cemeteries to show off hate placards…they'll be home for Christmas. You can count on them. They'll be full of peace on Earth and good will toward everyone who is the same race and religion as they are. They'll listen to Christmas tunes (listed below) and ignore the truth…that they were written by Jewish songwriters who had enough empathy and appreciation for Christmas tradition that they could convincingly write classic songs about the holiday.
True racism is such a sign of stupidity. EVERY member of a particular color or religion should be shunned? Some "good Christians" who admire Paul Simon, Dinah Shore, Dear Abby, Kirk Douglas, Freud, Einstein or Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley of KISS, or Bob Dylan…or who ogle Lauren Bacall, Natalie Portman or Tina Louise…would want them dead?
How bizarre, hypocritical and just plain dumb are people who think theirs is the "master race," and would not hire or allow a relationship with someone "not like us." Even more sinister is when "not good enough to marry my sister" or "not someone I'd invite to the house because of THAT color or THAT religion" escalates to economic sanctions ("I won't hire HER") or outright violence. Really Mr. Christian? You are entertained by these people but you hate them and make jokes and vicious remarks about Jews? About Jake Gyllenhaal, Mila Kunis, Shia LaBeouf, Emmy Rossum, Daniel Radcliffe (aka Harry Potter), Michelle Trachtenberg, Elizabeth Berkley, Adrien Brody, Brooke Burke, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Kate Hudson, Amanda Peet, Winona Ryder, Maya Rudolph, Alicia Silverstone, Tori Spelling, Rachel Weisz, Jack Black, Gina Gershon, Lisa Kudrow, Lou Reed, the duo known as Steely Dan, Pink, Lenny Kravitz, Adam Levine, Warren Zevon, Carole King, Carly Simon, David Lee Roth, Mark Knopfler, the J. Geils Band, Herb Alpert, Andrew Dice Clay, Janis Ian, Geddy Lee, Marc Bolan, Mama Cass, Leslie West, Groucho Marx, Billy Crystal, Mel Brooks, Jerry Seinfeld, and Phil Ochs??
You, Mr. Antisemite out there, you'd LYNCH the Three Stooges?? Idiot bigots would rather scream the bullshit about how the Jews killed Jesus, than acknowledge that Jesus was a Jew. Jew ready for the list? It features some of the best…and worst of the holiday (Christmas, wintertime) soundtrack.
WHITE CHRISTMAS - Yes, this was just one of many ("Easter Parade" and "God Bless America" being others) from the pen of Irving Berlin. He also wrote "Happy Holiday." Go ahead, say he was just a conniving Jew out for money, and clever enough to write one of the most sincere and lovely ballads ever to be groaned by Bing Crosby. Except, for a Jew, Berlin was awfully generous…every cent from "God Bless America," for example was donated to the Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts organizations. David Hinckley of the Daily News: "If it weren’t for Jewish songwriters and moviemakers, a big chunk of our Christmas tradition would melt away faster than Frosty the Snowman….“White Christmas,” was written by Irving Berlin, whose Jewish parents transported young Israel Baline from Siberia to the Lower East Side some 50 years earlier…he told his secretary, “This is the best song I’ve ever written. Heck, it’s the best song anyone’s ever written.' What’s clearer and sadder is that Berlin, while not an Observant Jew, found little personal joy in the day. His son Irving Jr., three weeks old, died on Christmas in 1928.That might be part of the reason “White Christmas” has such a strong undertone of melancholy, yearning for something that feels just out of reach."
SANTA BABY - by JOAN ELLEN JAVITS and PHILIP SPRINGER. Oh, those Jews. TWO of them in this case, and not only did they write a hip pop tune, it was sung by Eartha Kitt, a black woman! Joan Javits was the niece of Republican-Liberal senator Jacob Javits.
SANTA CLAUS IS BACK IN TOWN - is another item in the vast songbook of Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller, who wrote so many great songs for black artists (including Big Mama Thornton and The Coasters).
RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER - Just about the most annoying novelty record of all-time, it was written by the team of MARKS and MAY. Johnny Marks redeemed himself, slightly, with the less obnoxious "A Holly Jolly Christmas" and "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree." Marks is the great uncle of Steven Levitt, author of "Freakonomics."
LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW - One of the world's wimpiest tunes, it embarrasses me every time I hear Dean Martin emote, "The weather outside is FRIGHTFUL." Yeah, like he didn't live in California and Las Vegas most of the time. The song was written by Julius Stein and Samuel Cohen (aka Jule Styne and Sammy Cahn). The duo also wrote the more obscure "Christmas Waltz," and there's also "Be a Santa," which is in the Jule Styne musical "Subways Are For Sleeping"
SILVER BELLS - inspired by the dingers the Salvation Army volunteers wave at people to get donations at street corners, the song was written by Raymond Bernard Evans and Jacob Harold Levison (the latter better known as Jay Livingston). PS, those two wrote a helluva lot of songs the rednecks love, including the theme for the TV show "Bonanza."
YOU'RE A MEAN ONE, MR. GRINCH - Yes, the lyrics were written by the Jewish "Dr. Seuss." The music is by the former "Albert Marcuse," who grew up in Berlin. But to avoid being killed in Berlin by Nazis, the family name became Hague, and they became Lutherans. But to antisemites, if you're born a Jew, you'll die one…which is pretty damn Grinchy.
WINTER WONDERLAND - This rather annoying song (the parody "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear" is even preferable) was the lone hit lyric for Richard B. Smith, who died a year after Guy Lombardo first recorded the song in 1934. Smith was just 34. Jewish? Nobody knows, but the guy who wrote the music was Jewish…Felix Bernard, born Felix Bernhardt in Brooklyn.
SLEIGH RIDE - Do Jew haters also hate the lyrics for this song? One group is not exclusive to the other. The lyrics ARE very irritating, and the work of Mitchell Parish, born Michael Pashelinsky in Lithuania. Parish wrote many lyrics better than this ("Star Dust" among them), and Gentile composer Leroy Anderson wrote a few tunes much better, too, including "Syncopated Clock," and that goofy "The Typewriter" that Jerry Lewis mimed on most every variety show he ever appeared on.
THE CHRISTMAS SONG - aka "Chestnuts Roasting…" was written by two Jews. Bob Wells wrote the lyrics to this 1945 classic, and the French-sounding Mel Torme wrote the music. Torme's parents were Russian immigrants.
IT'S A MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR - this propaganda song for what is really the coldest and most depressing time of the year, comes from the Jewish songwriting team of Edward Pola and George Wyle (who was born Bernard Weissman). A better and less annoying song, at least to me, is the "Theme from Gilligan's Island," music by Mr. Wyle, and lyrics by the show's producer, Sherwood Schwartz.
THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS - has music from Bob Allen (original last name Deitcher) and words from Al Stillman (born Silverman). Stillman also wrote the lyrics for the very religious Frankie Laine hit "I Believe," and "Chances Are," the Johnny Mathis classic.
GETTING READY FOR CHRISTMAS - You're asking, "What? Don't quite know this one." Paul Simon's bid to join John Lennon and Paul McCartney in having a perpetually annoying Xmas song on the radio didn't quite make it. Maybe the African rhythm had something to do with that.
BABY IT'S COLD OUTSIDE - one of the creepiest of winter songs, it seems to get tossed onto too many Christmas playlists even though it has nothing to do with the holiday. It was one of the lesser songs written by Frank Loesser.
I'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS - one of the better Christmas tunes, featured music by the Jewish Walter Kent (born Walter Kauffman) , and lyrics co-written by Buck (born Samuel) Ram (Jewish) and Kim Gannon (not). Kent also wrote "I'm Gonna Live Till I Die." Buck Ram…well…there's some controversy about the guy. Some say he didn't write much of anything, just bought songs and put his name on them (including various hits for The Platters). Supposedly he didn't even write any of "I'll Be Home For Christmas," but somehow twisted a few arms to get a credit for it. He used to tell people the song was based on a poem he wrote when he was a teenager…and that his co-writers merely polished it.
HARK THE HERALD ANGELS SING - goes back a long, long way. Not a Tin Pan Alley number, it was written by Felix Mendelssohn, a Jew whose family eventually converted to Lutheran…a good idea, healthwise, at the time.
It's also worth noting that many of the wonderful songs that good Christians love to steal via blogs and forums, were not only written by Jews, but performed by Jews. At this very moment, in some antisemitic households, there's no doubt some people happily listening to Christmas songs and albums sung by Neil Diamond, Barry Manilow, Ed Ames, and even the very obvious Barbra Streisand. Let's not forget that bizarre Christmas album from Bob Dylan!
Your download? "I Want You For Christmas," sung by Betty Boop voice Mae Questel. I don't know if the composers were Jewish, but Mae certainly was.
I WANT YOU FOR CHRISTMAS MAE QUESTEL