Dumb blondes: sexy, alternately giddy and morose, seemingly incapable of pronouncing certain words of the English language, thoroughly capable of blowjobs IF they’ve had a nice dinner or good seats at a show…they are eternally fascinating.
Not to imply that Shell who once fronted “Shell and the Crush” was dumb. Perhaps she just played it that way, like Goldie Hawn. I've met Goldie, and she's genuinely cheerful, but far from dumb!
Back around the time Cyndi Lauper’s anthem “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” arrived, record labels were scurrying to find equally trashy, flighty, idiotic and erotic punk chicks to promote. Warners had an e.p. on “Shell and the Crush,” featuring the babe wearing a typical easy trash-and-vaudeville outfit. The opening girls-just-wanna-have-fun song? “Popular Girl.”
Why it didn’t become a hit, I have no idea. One dopey flash-in-the-pants cheap-twat song from Lauper was enough? Really? Who can EVER get enough??
Shell (that’s short for Michelle) had the sultry-snotty delivery down perfectly, her dialect typical of what you’d hear in any East Village used clothing store where chicks spend hours and hours holding skirts up to themselves while their boyfriends try to refrain from saying, "You look best wearing nothing at all."
As shell sings it, “Girl” is pronounced “Gehl” (rhymes with smell.) Like any pogo punk who would hop up and down because she has no idea how to dance, when she sings “go crazy” she has to pitch that itchy last word higher than what you’d get if you kicked Joe Besser in the balls: “Cray-ZEE!”
Another adorable quirk: she somehow can’t rhyme “with the crowd.” and “On the town.” Town is pronounced tyeeOWn. Oh, she was ahead of her time. Now idiot Millennial bitches say "Thank you" by pronouncing it "think yow." Gotta love it, that self-absorbed self-entitled girly-girl behavior.
Is it any wonder I kept this gem all these decades after Warners' publicity department mailed it to me? So what happened to SHELL after her rock dreams of stardom got CRUSHED?
The attractive singer got work as an actress and made a fortune via lingerie sales. Then she died of kidney failure before she reached fifty.
Ohio-born Michelle Kepler (October 5, 1958-February 1, 2008) first broke into show business in Chattanooga, Tennessee, her teen beauty getting her roles in “The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie” (hey, did she play the part that required topless nudity?) and “The Sound of Music” (no topless nudity).
After her Warners ep, she apparently divided her time between marriage and divorce (first husband, 1985-1991, second husband, 1993-2000) and building up her clothing business, promoted via the Home Shopping Network. She claimed that her “Lacy Afternoon” line of robes, shoes, blouses and jewelry and perfume netted her 20 million dollars. Or grossed. Well, I really don’t know how gross the perfume may have been. This was one of her mildly spiced items:
Her fame as an entrepeneur was matched, at least for a while, by television fame. Shell played nurse Amy Vining on the long-running soap opera “General Hospital,” concluding her work there in 2002. She seemed to concentrate on her business career after that, living her last six years in Portland, Oregon.
Shell's gone (unless you believe in "The Ghost in the Shell) but there’s probably a lot of bedroom action still going on involving “Lacy Afternoon” bedwear. Hopefully, some of the foreplay includes a play of “POPULAR GIRL.”
"POPULAR GIRL" - no premium account weaselry, no password, no Paypal donation request, no dodgy website full of malware and porn
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