Halloween Approaches and the legend of Zacherly lives on - HURRY BURY BABY

       Now HERE's a President that would NOT have been impeached! Ha ha! ZACHERLY, my dears..."

       John Zacherle was the pioneering "monster movie host," injecting laughs during commercial breaks of bad old horror films. Vampira would soon follow on the West Coast, and there would be a variety of assholes and Svenghoulies in dumbass make-up doing very poor imitations. Zach was so popular he got the cover of "Famous Monsters of Filmland," and even made novelty albums.

      He was “The Cool Ghoul.” Dick Clark, a broadcasting colleague of John Zacherle’s in Philadelphia, gave him that nickname. An irony is that at one time, Zach had his own TV show, ala "American Bandstand," featuring rock performers and an audience of New Jersey kids dancing to hit records. He was even a disc jockey for WPLJ.  

      Around Halloween, there's always interest in Zach's novelty tunes, and he still has a memorial page on the CHILLER THEATRE website, including a photo of him out of makeup: 

       I should go find my interview with Zacherle, but it’s on one of hundreds of cassettes of interviews yet to be digitized. I do remember him saying that his early recordings were made easy because of his association with Cameo-Parkway records. His label practically handed him the masters of their best hits, with the vocals wiped. He was allowed to simply ad-lib horror jokes (and his own laughter).

         In 1958, he had his Top 10 hit, well before “Monster Mash,” with “Dinner with Drac.” The B-side below is “Hury Bury Baby,” a ghoulish variant on the Hully Gully. He was an unlikely star among teens, at age 40. 

          The horror-novelty king was born in Pennsylvania in 1918, and graduated from the University of Pennsylvania. After World War 2 service, he joined a theater group, performed in local TV commercials, and in 1953 was hired by local WCAU to appear in a budget western-serial called “Action in the Afternoon.” A character he played, local undertaker Grimy James, was soon spun off into hosting duties when WCAU bought 52 old horror movies. They needed someone to even-out the timing of these ragged 78 minute or 65 minute B-movies, and Zach proved to be an inspired choice.  

           He didn’t merely introduce the films, he CUT into them. Like Ernie Kovacs (another local TV personality who would become national), Zach let his imagination run wild because there was no budget to hire writers. He "broke the fourth wall" as they say, and loved to irreverently stop a movie to offer a wisecrack or make fun of the bad acting. Soon the “Monster Craze” was in full bloom, and Zacherley paperbacks appeared, along with new Zacherley albums. 

           Fans of Zach never forgot him, and he turned up in films including "Brain Damage” and “Frankenhooker,” and even got a chance to make some new CD's. He began the mascot of the Chiller Theatre convention, a memorabilia show where corpulent Huelpigs would grin through their baby-like teeth and pay $20 to have him pose with them. This year's convention runs from October 25-27, and as usual, is located inconveniently for anyone who isn't in the New Jersey area and owns a gas-guzzler-mobile. The guests include old reliables like Elvira, Nancy Allen, Barbi Benton, Sara Karloff, May Pang and Lisa Loring, and some new recruits including Shirley Jones, Brie Darling (who was in the pre-Fanny and post-Fanny version of the all-female rock group) and Hal Linden.  Entire casts of incredibly shitty and pointless movies and TV shows will be there as well, along with a ton of people you never heard of, and a ton of blobs, plebs, clods and nerds who will leave their sweat on you as they brush past. Some will be in costume and some will only look like they're wearing a costume. But I digress. Check out the Chiller Theatre dotcom if you dare.

           I liked Zacherley, and collected the singles and albums, and had the books, and was glad to fulfill a childhood wish and get a chance to meet him (without having to do it at the Chiller convention). Fewer and fewer "vintage" horror personalities are still around. Fewer from the 80's and beyond are as memorable or classic, although you can find two reasons to be excited about Elvira. I know, a corny joke, but that's part of the fun with her. I spent about an hour with her, and one of her anecdotes was about doing Carson's show. She was promoting her line of VHS tapes including her mocked-up version of "The Thing With Two Heads." She told Johnny she was so proud of that one: "The Head with Two Things!" 

         She gave a deep breath to accentuate her TWO THINGS.  During the commercial break, she innocently said to Carson, "Oh, I'm SO sorry" about that slip of the tongue. Johnny smiled and said, "Don't con a con man."  

         Now Zach is just remains, but, ha-ha, he remains legend. Hury Bury Baby, my dears…  

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